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Tips on Moving Past the “IF ONLY” Phase of Life

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“IF ONLY” to be two very dangerous words.

“IF ONLY” has us looking for answers outside ourselves, forever trying to change how others behave in order to feel better about our own lives.

We believe that our relationships, work, and health could be better, if only this person acted a certain way, or if only there weren’t so many obstacles in the way. Life would be great, if only

It turns us away from the one thing that CAN change how we feel about our lives.



The land of “If Only’s”

Some people make the land of “IF ONLY” a place they live in, not just visit. They go there and set up camp!  Too many people think that if only they chose a different path in life they would be much happier and everything would be butterflies and unicorns!! Well, you know the grass isn’t always greener on the other side, it is greener where you water it!



So let’s water it!!

Here are a few tips on moving past the IF ONLY phases of your life.

  • Know that YOU and only YOU are completely in charge of how your life goes. It’s up to you to determine HOW you will deal with all that life throws and doesn’t throw at you. You get to say how it all goes!!
  • Quit playing the blame game. You may have some people or circumstances in your life where you throw in the “if only”, “If only so and so would do this, that or the other, life would be perfect.” If you are constantly finding yourself blaming others for the situation, go back and read number 1!
  • Realize that maybe, just maybe, you are right where you are supposed to be in life. You really have no clue what it would be like “if only”…maybe that’s not the path you should have taken or even need to regret not taking. Start with where you are and what you have and make changes accordingly. Remember, you get to say how it goes…see tip #1.
  • Life is tough…but SO ARE YOU! Accept the fact that life is not smooth and predictable.  The things you go through in life will give you the opportunity of getting stronger and developing more character when you can actually be tough and push through things.


In closing, remember this, your life is entirely up to you and how you handle what is thrown at you. Looking at external factors to find happiness will never get you the happiness you deserve nor will it keep you happy for too long. It all starts with YOU, not the “if only’s”.


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Hey there, I'm Melanie. I help women DITCH THE DIET MENTALITY and reclaim their health through mindful eating, hormone balancing, stress management, and digestive healing.

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